What is creativity? Creativity means "the state of being creative." Then what does creative mean? In Webster's Dictionary for Students, creative means "able to create new and original things." However, do students have ability to create something new nowadays? The main source of the problem regarding creativeness is today's school education system.
To begin with, the school's education system hinders students' creativity. In schools, what do we learn? Students learn same subjects more focused on academic subjects such as Math, Korean, and English. Most of the people believe that students have to be good at academic subjects in order to live a successful life when they grow up. However, there are a lot of students who have great talents at non-academic subjects. Then, it would be better for those students to focus more on the other subjects they are actually great at. For example, students who are good at sports should practice sports at schools beginning from elementary school while ones who are good at academic subjects should study at class. Thus, education kills students' abilities and creativeness because of the wrong education system.
Furthermore, in a sense that children are more imaginative than adults, the truth that education lowers ability of being creative can be inferred. Students are forced to sit and study the same subjects every day. There are seldom chances of drawing and singing which help increase students' abilities of being original. For instance, when children do not go to school and play at home, they have a lot of curiosity and pick up things to make a picture or form a shape. However, as they go to schools and start to lose chances of playing, their ability to be creative decreases. At last, when they become adults, their lives are no fun at all. They wake up, go to work, come back home, and sleep. This boring pattern of life repeats over and over and they even do not care much about it. To conclude, children grow up to be uncreative.
Lastly, education systems have to be changed in order to make students become creative especially in Korea. In Korea, parents are always forcing their children to study if they want to live successful lives in the future. Students live listlessly because they are busy going to academies or study rooms believing what their parents say. However, when walking around the streets, it is hard to see academies about music or physical education for students. For example, when you ask a walking student on a street "what academies do you go?" Then the answer would be "Math, Korean, Physics, English, Chinese, and Economics." Thesedays, students are studying machines. If the society wants the students to be creative, the society should change. The schools should make creativity classes for students.
To sum up, I agree to the idea of Ken Robinson since it is obvious that education kills creativeness of students. To make students more creative, the society has to change greatly. It is time to get out of the traditional minds and try some changes for our bright future.
This is a very safe, effective essay. You meet the minimum word count, have 5 paragraphs, and generally support Robinson's views in a straight-forward fashion. The grammar is solid, and you make sense. But is this essay about creativity that creative? I think you should try and push your writing to be a bit more colorful, and try using analogies, personal examples, and quotes from Robinson himself. You are also missing the video, which I'd indicated should be a part of your post.
답글삭제So while this is good and very standard, I get the sense you can do better if you push yourself just a little bit and dig deeper.